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When people come to us to share a concern or life issue, it’s easy to lapse into behaviors, reactions or verbal responses that—although often well meaning—serve to block us from hearing, or being present to the other person’s experience.
We’d be better off following the words of this inside-out saying:
“Don’t just do something; stand there.” share on Twitter
…and be mindful not to: Disconnect from your Vulnerable Inner Self. When someone comes to you with a problem or issue,
Continue reading Top 11 Barriers to Connection
By Francesca Starr, Ph.D., CPC
Why did I choose Voice Dialogue as the cornerstone of my transformational coaching and training practice? Voice Dialogue is the most inclusive, non-judgmental approach to personal and professional development I have encountered in over forty years of working with people and groups. Through this structured, safe and engaging pathway we meet the diverse sub-personalities, energy patterns, or Inner Selves that we all have within. We identify with certain parts of us – our Primary
Continue reading Voice Dialogue in Practice
Published in the August edition of Natural Awakenings Magazine
By Francesca Starr, Ph.D., CPC
There is nothing like the rush of enthusiasm, inspiration, and renewed hope that comes with a breakthrough insight, and the accompanying clarity of what actions to take. The shift out of a stuck pattern, the healing of an old wound, and the resolution of an intractable conflict, release a vibrant energy that opens us to larger possibility and stimulates our creativity. Our greatest fulfillment is
Continue reading Big Breakthroughs for Self-Discovery and Growth
By Francesca Starr, Ph.D.
With the help of Voice Dialogue you experience and begin to manage or moderate the many fascinating sub-personalities within you. You understand that some inner parts are highly developed and powerful (Primary Selves) while others are unknown, latent, and repressed (Disowned Selves). The Primary Selves often emerge in childhood to protect you from experiencing too much pain, hurt, or shame; and to help you succeed in life. The Primary Selves believe, and rightly so, that
Continue reading Three Breakthrough Insights for Vibrant Relationships
Published in Natural Awakenings Magazine, November, 2006
By Francesca Starr, Ph.D.
We ask so much of ourselves these days. We want to achieve everything we can—enjoy good health, love and be loved, attain meaningful success in our professional lives, develop spiritually, serve the world, and please everyone. Have I left anything out? Our powerful drive to succeed, this insatiable appetite to realize everything of which we are capable is very important. These impulses are full of passion and express a
Continue reading Be Perfectly Imperfect and Feel Great About It
Published in Natural Awakenings Magazine, June, 2006
By Francesca Starr, Ph.D.
Each of us knows the ferocity of the inner voice we hear shouting self-criticism. This voice has an uncanny ability to hit our softest spots and to pile on additional misery when we feel the most vulnerable. The Inner Critic often says the very thing that reinforces self-doubt and insecurity, shuts down creativity, and points out inadequacy—but there are ways to harness this same aspect of our psyche to
Continue reading Taming You Inner Critic: From Dream Killer to Visionary
By Francesca Starr, Ph.D.
As seen on GoodTherapy.org – March 23, 2010
This is the first in a series of articles on: 1) what Jung called the Shadow, 2) the Scapegoat phenomenon in families, groups, countries, and the inner family, 3) how Voice Dialogue (a cutting edge therapeutic, coaching, and personal growth method) can transform these potentially perilous, destructive aspects of the human condition to a journey of creative fulfillment, “extreme well-being,” and evolved consciousness. These articles were
Continue reading Voice Dialogue and Shadow Work
By Francesca Starr, Ph.D., CPC
As seen on GoodTherapy.org – April 28, 2010
This is the second in a series of articles on healing the Inner Scapegoat:
“From earliest childhood, Savannah had chosen to bear the weight of the family’s accumulated psychotic energy. Her luminous sensitivity left her open to the violence and disaffection of our household and we used her to store the bitterness of our mordant chronicle. I could see it now: One member
Continue reading Stop Taking on Others’ Stuff: Voice Dialogue and Healing the Inner Scapegoat
By Francesca Starr, Ph.D., CPC
As seen on GoodTherapy.org – October 29, 2010
This is the third in a series of articles on healing the Inner Scapegoat:
“For years it lay in an iron box buried so deep inside me that I was never sure just what it was. I knew it carried slippery, combustible things more secret than sex and more dangerous than any shadow or ghost. … I saw things I knew no little girl
Continue reading Voice Dialogue and Healing the Inner Scapegoat: A Transpersonal Perspective
By Francesca Starr, Ph.D., CPC
This is the fourth and final article in a series on healing the Inner Scapegoat:
In the first three articles of this series we discussed the Shadow or Disowned Territory in the psyche, the historical Scapegoat and its impact on the human community, and the development of the Inner Scapegoat. We entered into a Voice Dialogue process with a composite client named Helen to support a sorting, clarifying, healing, and discharging process to
Continue reading Voice Dialogue and Healing the Inner Scapegoat: A Transpersonal Perspective
By Francesca Starr, Ph.D., CPC
As you step through the doorway from one year to the next, it’s natural to do as Janus does: look back and ahead. But this year, instead of just reflecting on the past year or making New Year’s resolutions, consider using this first part of the year to take stock of your life. Take time to hear the voices calling to you from deep within. They will help give direction and focus for your personal
Continue reading Taking Stock and Reconsidering Inner Child Work: Time for Unflinching Honesty & Unfinished Healing?
By Francesca Starr, Ph.D.
The Critic is a universal and punishing constant in our inner lives. This internalized voice assumes the tone and language of the judgmental, shaming aspects of our parents, grandparents, siblings, teachers, peers, religion, and society. After every step we take, there it is, doubting or damning our choice. For many people, “critic” is too mild a word. The voice they hear is relentless, a vicious screaming monster that cripples and controls. They might call their voice
Continue reading Healing the Roots of Self Hatred
Published by Nexus: Colorado’s Holistic Journal, September/October 1996
By Francesca Starr, Ph.D.
The task of confronting the brutal, destructive elements of the Shadow has become in the 20th century the inescapable destiny of our species: If we fail, we cannot hope to survive.” John Sanford
Atrocities, from the holocaust of Nazi Germany to the Oklahoma City bombing, are often described as “unfathomable,” “unimaginable.” In saying that we cannot understand people who perpetrate violent acts, we are in effect thrusting these
Continue reading It’s Time to Do Our Shadow Work
Published by Inanna’s Net, Volume I, Issue Two, April 1993
by Francesca Starr, Ph.D. and Deborah Morris, LCSW
The descent to the underworld is generally an excruciating downfall, comedown, or decline, often triggered by a significant trauma, that makes everyday living and business-as-usual impossible. It is a demand for the transformation of consciousness and one’s entire body-of-affairs. It is “the shedding of outdated structures of the psyche…at the bottom we meet ourselves stripped bare with nothing left but our mere
Continue reading Do We All Have To Go Through A Descent to the Underworld?
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